My world used to be a strong, metal fortress.
Security was found in the joys of nature,
The babbling creek and Canada geese,
Picking roses and catching crickets,
Building forts and tossing balls.
Not many years of life were lived,
And then irreversible changes came.
Death of family left my life never the same.
But through those childhood and teenage years,
The stable things so near and dear were my surety.
Then the time began speeding up.
I became a small atom in a giant world.
Ever smaller it seems I've grown,
Less and less to call my own.
Everything is changing, including me.
Fire began to melt my strong fortress.
Saying good byes, giving up my pets,
Seeing my security fly away,
Being ripped from my home—
Can you blame the pain?
I feel my world sinking, ever changing.
I cry within, some tears some see.
Overwhelming world.
I want to my home back.
But I want to go to Heaven.
Soon.
Cami, thank you so much for posting this. I know I hardly know you nor you me, but it really blessed me.
ReplyDeleteThe first few weeks of the school year I know there are always so many people who must be going through homesickness and yet I've felt somewhat at a loss to help them or even to be understanding since its been nearly 10 years since I went through it and I honestly couldn't remember what it was like. Your poignant, heartfelt words opened up the memories of my own experience and I'm able to feel it again like when I first went through it. Thank you so much for sharing!
And... I know encouragement from a total stranger is hardly meaningful, but for what it's worth.. Hang in there. :) Some days will be tough..very tough.. But not one single day will ever come when He won't make a way of escape so that you can bear it. Heaven will be cheap enough no matter what we have to endure here. Jeremiah 29:11 :) pfy
You know, a whole year later I reply. Thank you Beth. I've been re-reading my postings, wondering at some of them, and re-echoing others. Just last night was experiencing similar feeling to this unique attempt to depict what was in my heart a year ago. Your words encouraged me again. :) The last year was blessed. The pain only made it more precious. I'm about to depart for Weimar again- and leaving home is not a whole lot easier this time. But God knows and makes no mistake!
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